A Harsh Reminder: No One Cares About Your Fantasy Team

It's that time of the year again. What time you ask? NFL Football? Pumpkin Spice Latte season? Time to eat an entire bag of Cool Ranch Doritos in one sitting? Well yes, all of those things, but it's also fantasy football season. With that brings along a time honored tradition: people talking about their fantasy teams to people that don't care at all. I mean at all. There is nothing more self-important and obtuse in the world than thinking other people care about a fake team (of which they have five of their own). I, Armen Saryan, know this fact very well. In fact I often rail on people that talk about their fantasy team. However I was guilty of doing just that last night on twitter.

After two heartbreaking fantasy losses to open the season Monday Night, I gave into the urge of looking for pity and sympathy from others on twitter about said fantasy losses, thinking somehow people would care about my misfortune and offer words of sympathy, outrage that this could happen to a poor wretch like me, even money and gifts to soothe my pain. Like an idiot, I actually thought it was a good idea to make people aware of my fantasy heartbreak. Well i'm here to tell you that it's still a bad idea. Not only do people not care about your fantasy sports misfortune, they want to tell you about theirs. And as soon as they do, you don't care, and you have that epiphany all over again: well then Armen that means they don't care about yours either.

So my apologies to my followers who had to waste their time scrolling through that nonsense. And to my best buddy Quinn who you can hear on FM 106.1, Milwaukee's Best Country, congrats on your week 1 victory.

 
The Double Team with Dario Melendez

The Double Team with Dario Melendez

The Double Team with Dario Melendez airs weekdays from 1 until 3 p.m. Read more

title

Content Goes Here